Lilah – as part of her effort to be the easiest child in New Jersey – has started potty training at twenty-one months. As you may guess, that means we spend a great deal of time sitting in the bathroom. Actually, she spends a great deal of time sitting in the bathroom; the adults take a shower, go fold laundry, or reply to a few emails. She wouldn’t want to be a bother.
She was having some trouble distinguishing between farting and pooping, being quite convinced she had pooped when in fact she had just passed a little gas. Every time she did it on the toilet, she’d look alarmed. “Just a little fart!” I’d tell her, until she began to realize what she was doing.
Now, every time she toots on the toilet, she smiles delightedly and announces “Fa!”
We were cooking together on Sunday morning, when I smelled something from her diaper. “Did you poop?” I asked her.
“Es!” she replied.
“OK, let’s go change your diaper. Go lie down.” She scampered over and lay down on the floor. It turned out, however, that she once again had confused gas with a bowel movement. “Oh, sweetie. You didn’t poop. Just a fart!”
She shook her head and grinned. “No fa; mama fa!”
Her very first sentence was a fart joke. Daddy is so proud.
But it was a fart joke that required a semi-colon, so she’s still Mama’s little girl.