I wonder what Lilah will call them

            According to Benjamin’s former toddler group teacher, children who know the proper anatomical terms for their private parts are less likely to become victims of molestation.  Knowledge gives them power, if the adage is true.

            Well, then my kids are pretty darned safe.  Not only do they know the proper terms, but they are quite happy to use them in all situations.  Hence, Zachary, when using the bathroom alongside a new acquaintance, has been known to inform her, “This is my p-nis.”  I am sure her mother appreciated show-and-tell.

            Zach did have a hard time learning the proper word for the dark pointy things at the ends of my breasts, however.  When he was just two, he would often see me breastfeeding Benjamin, so he requested the necessary vocabulary for processing the experience.  Unfortunately, he kept confusing his nipples (and mine) with the bendy part in the middle of the arm.

            I was feeding his brother out of my elbows.

            Benjamin, now two, also wants to be sure to embarrass me whenever possible, so he has long since asked for the word for those little circles on his chest.  He, too, has confused the word “nipple” with another body part, which explains the conversation we had the other day.

           “What are these things in there, Mommy?” he asked, picking up the round, cotton pads.

           “They are my breast pads.”

           “Ooooh, I like them for your pimples.”

           Maybe “nipples” is a really hard word to pronounce.

18 responses to “I wonder what Lilah will call them

  1. Laughing, here.

    Every now and then my girl gets mixed up and says “my penis.” Which is pretty funny.

  2. I’m laughing, too.

    I hadn’t heard that there were safety benefits for kids to know the real anatomical terms, but it makes sense. I’m also inclined to believe that there is less chance of sexual repression.

  3. My boys like to tell me daily that boys have penises and girls have baginias. Close. Good enough, right?
    I’m all about using proper names for parts ‘n pieces but for some reason I prefer saying boobs over breasts. I don’t know why. I just find breasts a difficult word to say. Maybe it is the sts part. ???

  4. Ben had the name right (nipples) but he was older. And he used to breastfeed his doll while I nursed Alex. I bought him another doll now that he’s having a sister, and I’m sure he’ll “nurse” her too.

  5. Gotta love kids and parts! My night my three year old use the word “meatballs” to describe his testicles, I almost passed out from trying to suppress my laughter.

  6. Halloween night I was trying to get the boys into their costumes in the playroom downstairs when the doorbell rang. Trick or treaters. The boys, now completely NAKED, could NOT let me answer the door without them. Of course not. So they shared their penises with the neighbors down the street, who of course could not stop snickering.

    Boys are soooo much fun.

  7. Oh…I am laughing an rollin all over the floor:-)

  8. My kids called them “pimples” too! Makes me smile just remembering it! Thanks!

  9. Pimples, oh I love that.

    When Bailey was two she loved to scream out, my mommy has boopies. In Target mostly, like it was some kind of boopie paradise or something. She got a lot of laughs with it.

    My girls know the proper terms but they have over the years, made up other words that they like saying more. This, I’m cool with, since they know the real words.

  10. We had bumples for a while. Amazing isn’t it that every young boy I know of has had no trouble at all learning penis? My son looooved the word when he learned it – PEEEEnis over and over and over… sigh.

  11. Well, if anyone had pimples that big, breast pads would be helpful.

    My nephews used to have a hard time with the word vagina: basagna (rhymes with that Italian food item), they would call it.

  12. We’re all about actual words too. Well, nearly, as I used “boobs” instead of “breasts”, though P calls them “poops”. “I no have poops Mum!”

    She is forever talking about her vulva, and I have to say I do get embarrassed. I mean, do strangers need to know she wiped her vulva after weeing in the potty? Probably not.

  13. My daughter called them “pimples” too for the longest time! So weird. She still slips up sometimes even at 6. Good times….

  14. It must be hard to pronounce. Mini said “nickels” for the longest time.

  15. Oh, funny. I remember when my son was little, five or six, I guess, we passed by an image in a shop window of a Jessica Rabbit-type woman. At which point my son exclaimed ‘Look at the hips on her!’ I like to think they don’t just mangle the language, but bring something special to it!

  16. We cracked up today as Eleanor’s friend talked and talked about her vagina. She’s 7 and didn’t know it was so hilarious.

  17. omg I absolutely love that story! pimples….

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