Challenge week eight: New Math

            I’m sure you’re wondering what I weigh this fine morning.  I’m wondering that, myself.

            Last night, Lilah slept for more than eleven straight hours, for which we are considering sponsoring a tri-state parade in her honor.  Shortly after hour ten, I staggered into the bathroom, engorged with my gluttony of sleep.  I weighed myself as breastmilk sprayed all over the bathroom.  Then I rushed out to assemble the hand pump.

            J got ready for the gym while all three of the children remained asleep, even though the sun was shining.  “I’m up 1.7 pounds from where I started,” I told him.  “That’s almost 3 pounds from last week.  Of course, I’m about to pump some of it off.”

            “Well, you have to weigh yourself after you’ve pumped,” was his rejoinder.  (I think the English language needs a verb for a reply made in the tone of voice that implies “duh.”  “Snipped” implies something nasty and “scoffed” is more derogatory than this mock-insulting reply really was.)  So, I pumped six ounces and weighed myself again, only to find I was an entire pound lighter. 

            Now, I know I was an English major in college, but I am not so bad at math.  Last I checked, there are 16 ounces in a pound.  Anyone know how pumping six ounces made me lose an entire pound?

            It also begs the question of my actual weight, since I was carting a couple of feedings around in my boobs this morning.  Do I subtract for the additional eight ounces of milk?  And how much do I subtract? 

            I think maybe we should just say I had two good workouts at the Y and call it a week.

16 responses to “Challenge week eight: New Math

  1. I don’t care what you call it, I can totally get behind that kind of math.

  2. I like that math. Can I have the reverse applied to my bank account? And maybe you can weigh your boobs before and after feedings? Or, ya know, subtract 5 pounds per kid.

  3. Maybe the act of pumping burned off the other part of the pound?

    I think I am still the same weight. But, I was recently stuck with a death cold (would have been the dreaded “man cold” had I been a man) and slacked off considerably in the working out dept. At least I didn’t gain weight.

    This week is the back to working out hard week.

  4. that is totally my kind of math

  5. I know all about the tri-State parade for such achievements. As for the weighing thing…..heaven only knows. I recall a similar conversation with my own expert. I think perhaps I used the loo in between whiles and messed up the figures without realizing it.

  6. Well … did ya pee too?

    Congrats on the sleep! Mr. Plum slept through last night too, but The Snake wound up in our bed instead. Boys.

    How ’bout “chided” for a verb?

  7. No, no. I peed before pumping. ALL I did between the weighings was pump…

    “Chided.” Excellent.

  8. You’re pumping fluid ounces, ie volume. Dry ounces (weight) is a different measure. A fluid ounce of water weighs roughly an ounce (1.043 ounces according to wikianswers). I’d expect breast milk to be heavier. If you want to experiment, you could weigh the container empty, then weigh it full. But I’d just say go with how the scale read today. Full–one pound heavier. Good workouts.

  9. Did you, er, use the facilities? I also found erratic results when weighing myself every 10 minutes after L was born. It turned out putting a digital scale on a carpet instead of a hard floor interferes with its accuracy. Oh, wait, I just read Lilian’s comment. Show off. 😉 But probably right because it sounds very scientific. As for a verb, how about ‘drawled’?

  10. It’s good karma for being a loving mother. Take it and run. (or take it and sit, seems you don’t need to run if the weight is literally falling off you.)

  11. Doesn’t fluid weigh more than dry? (Wow, THAT sounds like a weird question.) But maybe that’s why. I don’t think 6 fluid ounces should convert to 16 dry though. Weird.

    (Clearly, I was not a math major either.)

  12. Fluid ounces aren’t a measure of weight, but a measure of volume. You could fill up a cup with water or you could fill it up with oatmeal, for example. The oatmeal is going to be heavier than water.

  13. My weight fluctuates like that sometimes, in the course of a few hours – it drives me nuts. I’ve never tried pumping and then weighing myself though, I usually weigh myself once a week, right after I get up to pee, but before the baby gets up to nurse (she’s one now). I’m hoping that would take me down another pound too 🙂

  14. Ah, an addition, then to the rule: weighing only in the morning, after using the bathroom, before consuming anything, and AFTER pumping/nursing.

    Nearly 4 years of nursing and not once did a loss of 6 ounces equal a pound. Damn.

  15. That’s why I never weigh myself. The scales just love to mess with us!

  16. i lost about 1.6 pounds. which still has me higher than when we started. but at least I’m moving in the right direction again.