When I grow old, in addition to wearing purple, I will probably bitch about a lot of things. It seems to me one of the benefits of getting older is you can kvetch and no one gets to say anything. So, I plan to take full advantage. I am going to carp, grouse, and bristle, and when I am done with that, I’ll take a break to be argumentative.
It will be Zachary’s job to deal with me, because I am currently paying into that little account by putting up with all his whining, complaining, and bellyaching. He has certainly gotten much better since finding out he will not have to graduate preschool on Thursday, but he is the Master of the Quibble and the King of the Cavil. So, I intend to pay him back as an old lady.
If, however, I ever start shitting in my pants or on the living room floor, thereby requiring full baths before eight AM, THAT will be Benjamin’s problem to deal with.
Seriously, people, help a girl out. He will not poop on the potty. He will not ask for a pull-up. He is completely pee trained and has been for a long, long time. My husband was astute enough to notice that when Benjamin is undressed from the waist down, he will not go on the floor and will actually tell us he has to go potty, although he still cannot bring himself to poop there and will hold it till he has pants or a pull-up on. So, we are letting him go naked a lot (much to his delight). However, there are limits to that, mostly required by law. And, much as I’d like to follow him around waiting, that would require a 1-1 adult-child ratio. Any suggestions would really, really, really be appreciated. (Except if you tell us to back off and give him time, because we have tried that several times, giving him plenty of space, and it has made no difference except to make him insist he is ready for underpants. And we don’t want to go backwards on the pee training by putting him in pull-ups all the time, because he pees in those much more than he pees in underpants. And we can’t give rewards for pooping on the potty because he NEVER does.)