Are we still arguing about this?

In a few hours, the Super Bowl will begin.  To be frank, I never have had any interest in the Super Bowl, although this year I do think New Orleans could use the win.

What I do care about, however, is a woman’s right to choose.  Having children has made me less able to empathize with the choice to abort a pregnancy.  I just can’t put myself in that position emotionally because my pregnancies ended in such a good place.

Having children has also made me more committed to supporting that choice, perhaps because I am pro-choice for reasons that are no longer personal.  I am not protecting my right to choose – I am standing up for a principle that I believe in regardless of my own gain.

Make no mistake – I believe in the right to choose as a fundamental principle. Our reproductive systems simply must not be subject to government regulation.  Do I think people should try to behave responsibly in how they use their bodies?  Abso-fucking-lutely.  People should try not to conceive children unless they are able to raise them.

People also probably should try to think about the impact their reproductive systems have on our planet.  I recently saw a magazine cover with those Duggar people holding yet another baby.  The headline read something along the lines of: “How many children are too many?”  Well, I am not qualified to reply, but I do think the answer falls somewhere between zero and 19.   I’m just sayin’.

That said, I don’t think the government has any business telling the Duggars what to do.  Octo-mom?  Well, since the taxpayers are footing her bills, folks have a right to be pissed off.  But if the government ain’t raisin’ the kids, it ought not be telling people whether or not to have them.

Neither, might I add, should professional athletes and their mothers.  They can preach all they want in their churches or whathaveyou, but they have no right to ask the government to stick its nose up my vajayjay.

I find it baffling that this ad is about a woman who chose not to abort and her son became a star athlete.  What the hell does that have to do with anything?  You don’t see the pro-choice movement airing ads in which Ted Bundy’s mama comes on saying, “If only I had aborted…”  (Now, of course, someone’s going to leave me a comment saying that Ted Bundy’s mama is dead or with some other fact that completely misses the point I am trying to make because for some reason people love to argue with me about crap that has nothing to do with the larger point I am making.)

I’m done having babies, and during my final c-section my obstetrician gave me a bit of surgical insurance against any more.  But, someday my children will be old enough to have babies, and I sure as hell hope they retain control over their own bodies.  Because I worked awfully hard to make those little bodies, and I just am not ready for Sarah Palin to start deciding what they do with them.

OK, so maybe my political stance still is personal, after all.  As is Tim Tebow’s.  The difference?  He feels his personal beliefs ought to dictate what other people can do with their bodies, while I feel my personal beliefs ought to dictate what I do with mine.

16 responses to “Are we still arguing about this?

  1. eugeniadealtura

    Thank God for your post, and for your position. I am living outside the U.S. and am not sure if this ad will air with the superbowl program here, but I am sure I’ll catch it online later. Did you see Planned Parenthood’s response to the ad?

  2. I agree with you, and yet I cannot wrap my mind around late term abortions, children who COULD survive if they had been born (I get that in most cases they would still need medical help)….. but I still cannot fathom that kind of abortion… advances in medicine make the lines blurry these days, I know of 24 weekers who have survived and even thriving, and yet on the other hand I am totally against way too much governmental involvement (hello that is one of the main reasons I am a Republican because I do believe government has its flipping place, and up in my business– ALL of my business— is not it)…..

    I guess what further complicates the issue, is that if the baby is wanted, and a mother gets shot, and the baby and mother die, then it becomes the murder of 2 people, but if the parent chooses they don’t want a baby, then its just a fetus. Where is the line, should there be no line at all??? If the baby is of your body then its your choice up until the last moment?? I just dont know….. from where I sit there has to be SOME sort of line…. I just don’t know where that line should be.

  3. having been on both sides of this decision, the abortion and the adoption I can say that I believe responsibility is key.

  4. I expected that having children would change my opinion on abortion, and it didn’t. It confirmed for me that I don’t want to have one, but as a married woman living with reasonable financial comfort I wasn’t likely to have one in the first place. However, it did NOT cause me to think that other people shouldn’t have the freedom to make their own choice.

    I haven’t seen the ad, obviously, as it hasn’t aired yet, but I find the idea to be repugnant and redundant. Obviously, everyone who is here today survived pregnancy, I don’t really see why it’s so noteworthy.

  5. Bravo and thank you for speaking my mind so eloquently 🙂

  6. You have absolutely hit upon the fundamental question: Are women, or are they not, in charge of their “vajayjays”? James Dobson and Tim Tebow think the answer is “not.” And they don’t even have one.

    Scary thing is, a major television station agreed with them tonight, at least enough to violate its own “no advocacy ads” policy and rake in some big advertising bucks. Now our vajayjays have a dollar sign on them??

  7. It is a fragile walk we walk.

    I hate that that ad was allowed to run with no rebuttal.

    I would venture to say that Tim Tebow’s mother made an individual choice that resulted in a happy outcome.

    I would also venture to say that most medically prompted abortions would not end as well. But again, it is an indvidual choice. Just as I do not judge those who choose to carry to term a pregnancy where the death of the child at birth or soon thereafter is the 99.9999% probable outcome, I do not judge those who decide that they are unwilling or unable to do so in similar circumstances.

    When we as a society begin putting the rights of a potential person before those of an already existing woman, we are indeed playing God with the actual woman’s rights, personhood, body and soul.

  8. The Tebow’s are just putting a thought out there. They are not forcing anyone to do or not do anything. Seems to me, when such an important decision is to be made, people should want the decision-maker to hear as many different stories as possible to make the best decision for themselves.

  9. Your last line says it all – it’s my decision for me, not your decision for me.

  10. I’ve always considered myself pro-choice but I became even more so after I became pregnant and had my daughter. I seems almost inconceivable to me that anyone could ever think it was ok to say to someone “Nope, sorry. You’ve got to go through this huge, life-changing even though it might be financially, emotionally or physically devastating to you and you’ve got to do it because I think I know what’s better for you than you do.”

    I love being pregnant and having babies (you’ll note my profession) and part of the reason I feel as good about all my time gestating is because it’s all been with my consent. And here’s the part where I could tell you a really heart-warming story about how abortion allowed to me have the family I do now and to help create two other families but really, it’s beside the point. No one should make their decisions based one some other person’s nice little antidote.

  11. theroadletstravel

    Yes, yes, yes.

  12. As I think you already know, this is one of (apparently very few) places we don’t see eye to eye. I’ve tried to understand the Choice viewpoint, and I earnestly desire to do so. I would never, ever condone a man or a woman or the government or any power deciding when a woman should give her body over to a child. But I get confused over how the anti-abortion arguments are asking for that. Isn’t sex what leads to conception, after all? I ask, with all friendliness and desire to learn another’s viewpoint – doesn’t a woman by nature make that choice when she becomes one of the willing pair?

    • Catherine, Thank you for such a respectful question. My back is acting up (not helped by the children who are jumping on me), so it may be a few days before I can write a response. However, I welcome any readers who wish to RESPECTFULLY answer Catherine’s question to give it a shot in the comments. Thanks

  13. Well said. And agreed.

    Also, I appreciate your ‘football, huh? But Saints, okay’ if I can take the liberty to paraphrase what I understood. Because… if that’s what you’re saying, well, as we say down here… yea, you rite.

  14. Wow– and I thought all I was missing was football being over here. I’m speechless. Thank you, Emily for your post.