Benjamin is in the midst of an identity crisis, which is the kind way of saying he is being a total ass to his friends.  He bombed out two playdates this week – once because of a apple-slice feud that got out of hand.

The second playdate was a disaster from about twenty seconds in.  For the first nineteen seconds, he was excited to have his friend over; then it all went to crap.

In an attempt to salvage the playdate, I suggested we go outside for awhile.

“I just need to run to the bathroom,” the other mother said.  Feeling he had some important information to impart, Benjamin followed her.

“My mommy doesn’t have a penis.  Only a tushie.”

You know it’s bad when that’s the highlight of the playdate.

7 responses to “TMI

  1. Apple slices are serious business though. And so are tushies. Better luck with next week’s playdates!

  2. That’s hilarious, although you should probably get that rare physical condition checked out 😉

  3. Tushie isn’t so bad. My big kids always said Daddy has a penis, Mommy has hair. Gross. Are you perhaps sporting a secret Brazilian?

    The Pumpkin has been quizzing me lately about the name of my lacking anatomy and I’ve just dodged him.

  4. Reminds me of a friend who was shopping in the grocery store and too distracted to listen to just WHAT her son was happily singing until she saw a number of smiles sent her way – “It’s not a dork, it’s a PEEEEEnis!”

  5. I think my first grader is having an identity crisis as well. It breaks my heart watching them sort out some of these social situations and how to deal with them. In 1st grade he is bumping into not being accepted by people. Tough stuff.

    I do not miss playdates.

  6. Playdates are miserable. WHY? I don’t know. I just don’t know.

  7. my niece told my sister that she had a “front butt”